funny business

[it’s a funny business posting a blog. often, moments after ‘publishing’,iI am assaulted by thirty million thoughts…items left aside or overlooked in the process of waxing on and on about various minutiae of existence…this overload produces anxiety--where to stop?...which bits are of interest?--followed by a freeze on any writing whatsoever until an unseemly period of inactivity ensues…is anyone still there?...is this writer’s block]

[was it mentioned that not only beer but mayonnaise too is very expensive in Waikikamukau? the normal ‘family’ size jar—860 grams/30 ounces…a touch shy of a quart—costs NZ$10.39 (as compared to what $3.59 or so for you guys?). Our mayonnaise is made in Toronto by Unilever Bestfoods and is marketed as ‘Best Foods’ and imported into NZ and Australia …(‘Hellman’s’ would not be a market savvy moniker for this cultural milieu)]

Two new seasonal rituals have been added to our daily tea rites. Our winter breakfast now gives pride of place to porridge. Wim was always an occasional porridge person and now Lily is a convert. Mrs. Evans, her teacher at Columba and a major star in Lily’s universe, praised porridge as a super fuel for the school day and that did the trick. (A good friend suggested that porridge benefits from some pre-cooking the night before. This succeeds in fully cooking the whole oats (we eschew the rolled oats) when the process continues in the morning. I remember as a child thinking that starting the hot cereals the night before was silly—the ‘know-it-all’ ness of youth). So cereal du jour is porridge (a tastier moniker than ’oatmeal’ apparently) with currants and raisins (added in the morning) and topped with milk and dark brown sugar. (The Sunday menu is still buckwheat pancakes w/blueberries, Vermont maple syrup—recently re-supplied by Steve & Lydia—plus scrambled eggs and bacon.)

[yesterday, a celebration of my natal day, as I walked to the Museum theatre for some musical chores, a small procession of antique cars came purring along the one-way system. identifying a Buick and a Chevy amongst the native-American file I tried to get my mind around the dissonance between early morning perkiness pervading my existence and my need to label as ‘antique’ cars that were manufactured when I was 3 years old. obviously it is time to substitute ‘classic’ for ‘antique’.]

Now to seasonal rite number: it fairly two bristles with healthy activity—the hearth/homey activity of starting and feeding a fire! Our modest Shangri-la is fitted with radiators and circulating hot water, that is, if the small furnace downstairs has a fire in it. (Central heating is not unheard of in these chilly climes, it simply is not the standard as yet.) Nothing is simple in the antipodes though. An activity one think one knows a bit about has twists and turns specific to locale. Having observed Boy Scout-ism, your writer knows about balling up newspaper, constructing a tent of kindling over it, etc., then lighting a match to get the process underway. Girl Guides (the NZ version of Girl Scouts? Campfire Girls?) are wedded to the same procedure (having observed Tessa’s attempts too). You must understand that we live in an environment where humidity effects everything…(remember the truck attending to housing along the Water of Leith advertising “Mold, Mildew and Grunge removal’?)

Our first few attempts to get the fire going in the furnace required three matches on average. The angle required just to get the wood of the match burning was normal ‘singe finger’ attitude—the wood is so damp that we are already into special techniques even to start…then there is the newspaper. Tightly twisted up newspaper is too dense and damp in these environs to burn!...it smokes and smolders and dies out!

So here are the techniques for success in pyro-sphere inimical to combustion:
1) assemble three piles: slightly rumpled newspaper, torn up cardboard or corrugated cardboard and kindling. 2) light a little cube of a chemical solid that smells like kerosene—our favoured house brand is ‘Little Lucifer” and place it in the furnace, having first donned your fireproof gauntlet. 3) toss in the newspaper, one, two three sheets, then some strips of cardboard, perhaps now alternate cardboard and paper until that combo is roaring. 4) now add some kindling, close furnace door…this adds to the roar quotient. 5) begin adding small pieces of yellow larch that you split off the larger logs while #4 is ongoing. 6) before you add bigger logs, it doesn’t hurt to put a little coal in. this seems to help elevate the temperature quicker which in turn helps to ignite your bigger logs. 7) when your yellow larch logs are burning, add more coal and some blue gum (logs). these seem to have the highest threshold for ignition. 8) remember to turn on the pump that circulates the hot water. in an hour or two the temperature will be 100 degrees Fahrenheit. It is good to check the fire a half hour after you start, closing down the air a bit…more fuel will be need an hour after the start and then every hour throughout the day. this can be stretched to two if you are out…the temperature of the water will rise to 120 or even 140 eventually.

Since beginning this entry some weeks ago, we have had some warm days. Pruning, weed removal and puttering around the garden have motivated my nearest and dearest. Children are back to dry cereals. Adults porridge on…or off depending on the temperature. Fire making is now sporadic although it is our only tool for drying out the house.

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And news from the front pages of the ODT (Otago Daily Times):

New Zealand’s population has increased by 43.400 people in the last year because of an increase in births over deaths and now stands at 4,228,000. (22.8.07)

[when I say “red sky in the morning, sailors take warning” my nearest and dearest replies with “pink sky in the morning, shepherds take warning”; an implicit reminder that sheep outnumber the people here by about 17 to 1.]

Otago’s crayfish industry is enjoying booming times, helped by the recent drop in the exchange rate. Fiordland Lobster Co chief executive Mike SCHUCK…(did he change his name for this position or did the name determine his career choice?)

Undie 500 participants will be on a short leash this year as the organizers, police and authorities from towns in the path of the annual student pilgrimage combine in a bid to avoid a repeat of last year’s riotous behavior.

What is the Undie 500?
>Cars entered must have been bought for less the $500, have a current warrant of fitness and registration, and a sober driver.
>Prizes awarded for the best dressed, best dressed car, most politically incorrect and best overall.
>Rules include no littering and no airborne objects fired.
>The 2007 event leaves fro the University of Canterbury campus (Christchurch) at 10am on Friday and many hotels and 350km later, arrives in Dunedin between 9pm and midnight.


on to the day at hand…a trip to the Museum to see the displays entered in the Otago Science Fair (Wim has good information that he will win some prize—announced on Sunday; another school highlight will be a visit to Lily’s school on Friday to witness where her class has advanced in their 5 weeks of a French language nodule…